The best way to get a flakey-as-fuck pie crust is to use a bunch of fat, so here it is. Don't be afraid. Obviously pie isn't some everyday shit, so kick up your feet and know that you'll appreciate this fucker even more because you made it yourself. Now go take a lap.
Source: Thug Kitchen Party Grub
1. This shit is easiest in a food processor, but you can totally do it by hand if you don't have one. Just follow the instructions in step 2. If you have a processor, go for it: In a large food processor, throw together the flour, sugar, and salt. Pulse it a few times so it gets all mixed up. Spoon in the coconut oil in nickel-size globs so it isn't just sitting there in a huge blob. Don't use your fingers because you don't want that shit melting yet. Pulse the food processor again a few times until the chunks of oil get all mixed in and it looks like chunky sand. Pulse in 1/4 cup water until a dough comes together. If it still looks too dry, add enough of the remaining 1/4 cup water, 1 tablespoon at a time, until it all comes together.
2. No food processor? You still can get pie, so life isn't totally fucking bleak. In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, sugar, and salt. Spoon the coconut oil into the flour in globs about the size of a dime. Your hands will melt that shit, so use the damn spoon. Use a big fork and break those fuckers up further into the flour so when you are all done it looks like rough, shitty sand. The smaller your oil globs, the flakier your dough, so take a fucking minute and do this shit right. Slowly stir in 1/4 cup water and mix it up until a shaggy dough forms. If there's still way too much dry flour add enough of the remaining 1/4 cup water, 1 tablespoon at a time, until a dough comes together.
3. No matter how you made your dough, when that shit is all mixed up, divide it in half and press each half into a small fat disk. Wrap each in plastic wrap and throw those bad motherfuckers into the fridge to chill at least 1 hour before you get going, or up to 3 days.
4. When you are ready to go, roll a disk out on a well floured surface and throw it in your pie pan and bake according to whatever fucking recipe you are using.
View line-by-line Nutrition Insights™: Discover which ingredients contribute the calories/sodium/etc.
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Serving Size: 1 Serving (191g) | ||
Recipe Makes: 2 Servings | ||
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Calories: 726 | ||
Calories from Fat: 0 (0%) | ||
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Amt Per Serving | % DV | |
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Total Fat 0g | 0 % | |
Saturated Fat 0g | 0 % | |
Monounsaturated Fat 0g | ||
Polyunsanturated Fat 0g | ||
Cholesterol 0mg | 0 % | |
Sodium 1162.7mg | 40 % | |
Potassium 4.1mg | 0 % | |
Total Carbohydrate 187.5g | 55 % | |
Dietary Fiber 0g | 0 % | |
Sugars, other 187.5g | ||
Protein 0g | 0 % | |
Powered by: USDA Nutrition Database Disclaimer: Nutrition facts are derived from linked ingredients (shown at left in colored bullets) and may or may not be complete. Always consult a licensed nutritionist or doctor if you have a nutrition-related medical condition. |
Calories per serving: 726
Get detailed nutrition information, including item-by-item nutrition insights, so you can see where the calories, carbs, fat, sodium and more come from.
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